Confused, distraught, and desperate...


Q: What to do about a 3 week illness if seeking medical help could trigger a ***catastrophic*** family-oriented conflict?

Symptoms:  Suffering from a seemingly unusually long cold/infection/other illness. Symptoms include aches, weakness, chills, sore throat, hoarse throat, greatly painful swallowing that induces whimpering mostly in the morning, perceived enlarged (right) tonsil with white spots, persistent fluid build up in the middle or inner (left) ear, and periodic dizziness that occurs in clusters of varying numbers as short, almost rhythmic and percussive, bursts. There are a few (stupid) factors that may have contributed to whatever ails me. These factors include taking too much acetaminophen for too long and despite my better judgment drinking alcohol on top of that, living in an apartment that may have been rife with miasma from neglected dishes, leftovers, trash bags, and some putrescent liquid in an undrained dishwasher, smoking cigarettes indoors as a new habit, performing and receiving oral sex once from someone with questionable hygiene (although, there was no kissing or orgasm at all, if that matters), ingesting spaghetti with old tomato-based sauce that had been refrigerated but not covered (there had been a covered bowl of moldy pumpkin puree hiding out of sight on the top rack of the fridge. ingesting the spaghetti caused seemingly unusually uncomfortable vomiting. there was no incident of vomiting afterwards.). I think that's it, but as I am exhausted, I could be forgetting something. Please, please, please, as you read this, understand that despite the apparent conditions of squalor I have described, I am currently living in cleanliness. The past 3 weeks have been terrible due to this ailment, however, just before i came down with whatever this is I, for the first time in my life, learned that my life is worth living and I can actually work towards a newfound goal that will enable me to pursue an unlimited number of other positive goals... I say this because I want to dispel any potential worry regarding my mental state, hygiene, or other factors or habits that would affect my safety and the safety of others. I've fixed all my problems, haha, now I just need to get over being sick so I can experience life for the first time with my newfound perspective. Thank you so much for your time and any help or advice you may offer!

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