First time sex, girlfriend can't handle the pain

Patient : My girlfriend and I recently tried having sex for the first time. Twice we have tried and both times we have stopped due to her describing pain as "something you can't get through" . We have both looked up stuff about it and many say that the pain shouldn't be bad or there at all and that it's due to nervousness or something similar like fear of pregnancy or fear that it will hurt. I get about halfway in before she pulls away or tells me to stop due to the pain. She cannot put tampons in either telling me that the pain is similar just more intense when it's my penis.Is it something to do with the hymen and should it hurt as much as she is saying ? Or is it some other factor, maybe I am not getting the right angle ? Is there anything we could do differently or anything we could try to make it work ?
Symptoms:  Pain
Doctor :   Hi, Thanks for the query. I understand your concern. Pain during intercourse can be seen due to causes like dispari ty between genital organs, thick hymen, nervousness, vaginal infection etc. If there is no structural abnormality, simple measures like using vaginal lubricants during intercourse can help in relieving the problem. If the pain persists even after using lubricants, please do consult your doctor once and let her get examined. By examination, the length and width of the vagina, position, shape and thickness of hymen can be make out and vaginal infection can be ruled out. Then treatment can be planned according to the cause. Take care.

Related Q&A

Q: The end of the shaft of my penis is wrinkled when flaccid and when I get an erection it takes several minutes to expa...

Q: Hi I recently had quite vigorous sex with my partner. I noticed afterwards a small tear under my foreskin on the shaf...

Q: I had a small amount of blood in some discharge yesterday evening and I had intercourse with my boyfriend this evenin...

Q: Hey, so me and my girlfriend were about to have sex and and 45 minutes before I had a erections like 6 in row within ...

Q: I am 34 weeks pregnant and have grade 4 placenta previa, I have already had one heavy bleed and a hospital stay, I am...


Dr. James Obaji M.D.

  • 247 Reviews
  • Family Physician

Dr. Suneel Sharman M.D.

  • 190 Reviews
  • Family Physician

Dr. Pat Golden M.D.

  • 169 Reviews
  • Cardiologist

Dr. Kunaal Jindal M.D.

  • 112 Reviews
  • Plastic Surgeon