Help plz neurosurgon or and shrinks !

Patient : Hello i am a young boy from pakistan !! .. i am only 18 years old . i have been in severe depression for the past 12 years. my mind and brain are also in fever almost 24-7, and very often a wave of pain brusts my brain. and i cant stop it. I do masturbate , almost regularly , but because i have nothing in my life to enjoy ! sincerely nothing and i have many burduns on me , as to support my single divorced severe ill mother as well as with my married dad and his family , i am currently studing in univeristy, though some tough subjects are pretty easy for me to understand but some are difficult ! and when i try to concentrate my mind starting paining !!.well anyways i am also hurt by my relatives and gfz . i want to commit sucide but always something in me stopped it . when i want to kill myself by putting my hand on my neck to coke myself and to leave this horrible life i am not able to complete it but i always pray that somebody should shoot me and put me of this misery . i havent seen a doctor till now . should i or shouldnt i ! plz help !
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