Help.On dexedrine 17 years now its gone....

Patient : I am adhd quite badly had it from an early age.I was prescribed dexedrine in doses from 175mg a day in extreme then on 125mg for 14 years.In 2010 they stopped my dexamphetamine,after17 years also diazipam and amisulpride.I went to hell and back.Now in 2014 im still stuck in an emotional mess.My depression is extreme,i get it every day-all day,no feeling high like with bipolar.Anxiety is bad,i get panis attacks as well as alone or out.I shake with bad nerves.headaches,sweating,hot.I dont know if this is due to dexamphetamine took off me,but now in my case i have been applying to see a specialtist in manchester,england,for adhd.Twice up to now my gp has had me turned down,as the nhs either want or give to somebody a fund or a payment for adhd.I have recently applied again,please can u answer my question also 1 last thing,depression was so bad and living from day to day was very bad,so i started using amphetamine,or speed on the street.Its not legal good for me or anything else.thanx steve quinn ps my gp is dr evens,brookway medical ctre,altrincham rd baguley,manchester,23 stephen denis quinn 04/05/68 x
Symptoms:  adhd i always feel almost lost at times.I dont seam to suffer hyperactivety as an adult now.I am constantly loosing things.I dont want to go out meet any friends/family.I always sit in my flat and never see a soal.Concentration is very weak,i try my best but get so bored with most things,i try and move onto something before i go round in a circle.I tried to move between london where i lived then and los angeles.I couldnt make my mind up,going back/forth aprox 15 flights over 6 month.
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