This year has been very challenging for me, my father


Q: This year has been very challenging for me, my father lost his job, my family fell apart emotionally and we are a very sensitive and vulnerable family to begin with due to our personalities, especially me. I worry constantly about people around me, which start to really impact on me. I have low self esteem at times, due to my relationships never working out which has made me think that there is something wrong with me or constantly attempting to change my personality. I have a lot of responsibility on my shoulders, I have to pay for myself and worry about how my family and I are going to manage. I feel like everything is going wrong and it'll continue to go wrong. I am a happy person and I am optimistic, but I am very affected by negative energy and my family atmosphere constantly depresses me. I have tried to talk to my friends about it but they never take me seriously so it makes me feel like I can't or I am not allowed to talk about it. I have no interest in anything, if I was to stay home and not speak to anyone I would be fine, I have no energy to go out or the strength to want to go out and I used to be quite sociable. I feel like I have been like this for a while but I constantly avoid it or ignore it because if I believe I am depressed or can be close to depression I will fall right into it. My biggest fear is that my depression will affect my parents and ruin their lives, they might blame themselves and become depressed themselves as they are already very vulnerable. All I do is worry about people, if they're unhappy so am I. I constantly feel guilty for going out or having a nice time when my parents aren't happy. Their happiness determines my happiness and that is the problem, I love them more than anything and my biggest fear is doing anything to hurt them, and my depression will. But at the same time, I know I'm neglecting myself, and they both scare me.

Symptoms:  Depressed mood, loss of interest, anxiety, constant worry, little energy

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